hello there! meet our favorite child...It is no secret in the house that my husband and I are quite smitten with our female feline. Her name is Hermione, but we all call her Minou (mee-knew). Sometimes we call her Fluffernutters because she is, at times, quite a crazy fluffy ball of fur; but she is oh so cute and silly. I sometimes call her Marie, like the prissy sister from the movie "The Aristocats." She loves to be picked up and petted while she eats her breakfast or dinner. She acts helpless and lost around her food unless someone is there to give her attention. She spends 98% of her time on our bed, sleeping at night she between my husband and I. The other 2% she is either eating, using her "powder room" or following me around to make sure I come back to the bedroom to watch her sleeping. We adopted her along with her brother, Harry, almost seven years ago. While Minou is all cute and furry, Harry is a scrappy ball of a cat that has peculiar habits that are not really engaging for humans. He doesn't really care for us humans, or so it seems, as he often will scratch us out of mere spite (or so it seems). Sometimes he will come in the front door only to whine piteously to be let out the side door, then to come in again through the back door to mew again to be let out the front door. He is dizzying, and at times, quite annoying. My youngest calls him Scary Harry. Poor old cat. He can't really get a break, but then again, I am never sure he should actually get one as he has scratched almost every child and adult who has ever come into our house. One thing I used to joke about with my mother is that you can't have a favorite child, but you can have a favorite animal. It is like playing out dysfunctional family dynamics with your pets rather than your own children.
However sometimes, I wonder, can you actually have a favorite child and successfully raise all of them? Or, on a deeper more personal level, I wonder about myself: do I favor one boy over another? I don't think that I do, well at least from where I stand in my "objectively subjective" point of view. Yet, I know I often get caught in a cycle of worrying about one of them over the other two. At different times, each of them has had their turn as my focal worry point where I am trying to figure out what is going on in their life that is making them act a certain way. Usually I feel like the child I am worrying about is stuck and I am trying to figure out ways to help them. You can probably sympathize. And yet, isn't this an awkward form of favoritism glossed over as "good" parenting?
What about you? Do you have more than one child? Do you feel sometimes more sympathetic towards one than another? Do ever (gasp!!!) favor one over the other one? This is such a touchy subject, but I think that when you parent more than one child, so many different emotions, actions and motives come to surface, it is difficult to sort through them all and still be a conscious and loving parent. So what are your thoughts? I would love to know. xx